While many countries do in fact have mottos, that is not what we are after in this article. Country mottos are usually quite serious and represent some noble aspirations of the country’s people. In our list, we are more concerned with what those mottos would be if they were descriptive of the country in question. And not just descriptive, but descriptive in a very, brutally, and entertainingly funny way. You could probably think of several country slogans for your own country right off the top of your head.
It’s important to keep in mind, most of the slogans here are just in jest. While there is certainly a level of truth in each one, every country has its faults. Although those faults typically make for good humor and entertainment, they in no way reflect upon all the people of that country. At any rate, most of us will undoubtedly find these slogans to be quite silly and hopefully bring somewhat of a smile to your face, especially if you have roots or connections to any of the countries on our list. So, all in the name of good fun, these are 25 funny country slogans if countries actually had slogans.
Featured Image: Horia Varlan via Flickr
Switzerland

We don’t care.
Djibouti

No, for real. We’re a country.
Venezuela

Cheapest gas on the planet! (Raise the price 10,000%) Still the cheapest gas on the planet!
Sweden

Hating Denmark since 800AD
Belgium

We can turn your solution into a problem.
Australia

Everything wants to kill us.
New Zealand

We are not Australia.
Austria

We’re not Australia either.
Zimbabwe

Before we used candles, we used electricity.
Netherlands

Water wants us dead.
India

Everyone is already here.
Interested in more nation-focused humor? Check out 25 Countries That Did A Very Strange Job Of Translating Movie Titles.
Georgia

No, not the one in America.
Greece

Western civilization from cradle to grave
Iran

For the last time, we are not Arabs!
China

Made in China.
Romania

Our vampires don’t sparkle.
Germany

Dude that was a long time ago. Check out our cars.
Vietnam

Best food, pho real
USA

What other countries?
Nigeria

We’re all royalty here.
Hungary

We invented everything (well, not here…but it was still us).
Turkey

Not the bird
United Kingdom

We used to own you.
Denmark

We’re happy because you’re not here.
Canada

Sorry
If you like learning about other countries, check out 25 Newest Countries To Come Into Existence.