For those of you that don’t know, Florida is an interesting place. Well, at least in terms of the news. The serious reason for this is that journalists in Florida have much more access to police records than they otherwise would have in other states or countries. That’s right, you may find it hard to believe, but Florida has some of the most transparent government laws in the world. This means that it’s really, really, really, really easy to dig up dirt in the Sunshine State. There are almost no privacy laws when it comes to public records. There are few other places in the world where the governor of the state would be required to allow a journalist to come to his wedding, or where officials would have to publicly disclose every single little thing they discuss.
Although this is the official reason, and it’s actually quite a progressive one in many aspects (thumbs up to transparency), Florida has definitely allowed for itself to have a less than stellar reputation on the internet. This is because many news stories start with “Florida Man Does…” and usually what follows is borderline unbelievable. So, in honor of the Sunshine State, these are the 25 Craziest Things Ever Done By Florida Man You Might Not Believe!
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Florida Man Dies After Winning Cockroach Eating Contest
Edward Archbold of West Palm Beach collapsed after winning a cockroach eating contest. The autopsy revealed that he had choked to death on “arthropod body parts.”
Florida Teen Wakeboards Down Drainage Ditch Pulled By Galloping Horse
If you’re looking for something to do, this might be…still a bad idea. 17-year-old Florida teen had his friend record him from a pickup truck as he wake-boarded down a drainage ditch. He was pulled by a galloping horse spurred on by his brother.
Florida Man Eats Meth To Avoid Arrest, Doesn't Work
After Gregory Lee Rhodes was pulled over for driving recklessly, he told police that he had ingested an entire bag of meth in order to prevent the police from finding it.
Florida Man Sacrifices Goat In Bid For US Senate Seat
Although the headline is a bit misleading, it is still funny and the true story is equally as ridiculous. Augustus Sol Invictus (he changed his name to this because it means “majestic unconquered sun” in Latin) ran for Senate in 2016. And while he didn’t sacrifice a goat for the purpose of winning the election, he did in fact sacrifice a goat. And drink its blood. Why? After walking from Orlando to the Mojave desert he performed the sacrifice as part of a pagan “thanksgiving” ritual.
Florida Man Accused Of Killing Gators For Super Bowl Dinner
Richard Nixie was arrested for killing 5 small gators without a proper tag. Apparently, he intended to eat them for Super Bowl dinner.
Florida Man Puts Dragon Lizard in His Mouth, Smacks People With It
Benjamin Siegel, the owner of the store in which Edward Archbold died from eating too many cockroaches, was arrested for abusing a bearded dragon. According to the police report, he put the dragon in his mouth, tossed it in the air, and swung it at customers.
Florida Man Tries to Sell 3 Iguanas Taped to His Bike to Passersby as Dinner
Jeremy Dugas was arrested with three iguanas tied to the handlebars of his bicycle. He was caught trying to sell them to passersby while trying to convince them that the iguanas would taste great if they were cooked for dinner.
Florida Man Gets Shot By Dog
Gregory Dale Lanier was going for a drive with his dog in the passenger seat when it kicked his loaded gun and shot Gregory in the leg.
Florida Man Killed With Axe In Fight Over Beer
Joseph Robinson killed John Stubbs using an axe with two blows to the back after an argument over lottery tickets in an Orlando parking lot.
Florida Man Who Tossed Gator Into Wendy's Lets Gator Bite His Arm
Joshua James was in the national spotlight after he tossed a live gator through a Wendy’s drive-thru. Not long after, however, another video surfaced in which James allowed a gator to bite his forearm.
Florida Man Who Advertised ‘Legit Counterfeit $$’ On Craigslist Was Predictably Arrested
Business was so bad for counterfeiter Tony Jerome Torbert, Jr. that he turned to advertising his illegal activity on the internet. It’s not clear what he was thinking, but not surprisingly, the police soon came knocking.
Florida Men Arrested For Throwing Bricks At Each Other
Michael and James Remelius are identical twins, and as with most siblings, they sometimes get in fights. The problem is that this time they got in a brick fight…in their front yard. Neighbors, however, called police who came and put a stop to things.
Florida Man Flees From Police On Hoverboard
When Jerome Antoine Dennis of Clearwater was approached by police on suspicion of marijuana possession, he tried to get away on his hoverboard. Unfortunately for Jerome, the maximum speed of a hoverboard is right around 10mph.
Florida Man Dances On Top Of Police Car To Ward Off Vampires
Christian Radecki was arrested after dancing on top of a police SUV for 6 minutes before sliding down and ripping off the windshield wipers. When asked why he did it, he replied that he “felt threatened by vampires.”
Florida Man With Tattoo Of Florida On Face Arrested For Burglary
When Johnathan Hewett was caught trying to break into a home, the real story wasn’t what he stole (some guns and watches), but that he has a map of Florida tattooed on his face.
Florida Men Catch 'Skunk Ape" On Video
In case you don’t know, Florida’s version of Big Foot or the Yeti is the “Skunk Ape.” It’s called this because apparently it emits an extremely foul stench. And although most people don’t believe in such things, Mark Barton and Chris Conner think they finally found evidence of Skunk Ape’s existence. And yes, we are also surprised that this story didn’t somehow involve the police or drugs.
Half-bearded Florida Man Spends Night In Jail For Selling Marijuana
Kevin Gibson was arrested for trying to sell marijuana. It seems, however, judging by his mugshots, he may have had some of his own product while shaving.
Florida Man Flees Library on Scooter After Smelling Woman's Feet
Eddy Juan had apparently been spotted at Florida International University crawling under tables and sniffing woman’s feet. Although he got away, police later found him on his scooter and gave chase.
Florida Man Steals People Identities And Also Urine
Gerald Washington was caught posting fraudulent job offers in order to steal people’s social security numbers…and samples of their urine.
Florida Man Arrested After Butt Dialing 911
Derek Candelario was approached by police officers while playing basketball in Haines City. They had received a 911 call from his cell phone and just wanted to make sure the owner was alright. Derek, however, got very uncooperative as he had an outstanding warrant and thought they were there to arrest him. It looks like he’ll be carrying his phone in his front pocket from now on.
Florida Man Arrested After Punching Police Dog In Face, Has Handcuff Key Hidden In Rectum
Nicholas Byram punched a police dog in the face after crashing his car during a police chase. Police say they found marijuana in his car and a handcuff key hidden in his rectum.
Florida Man Files Lawsuit To Not Repay Student Debt, Claims He Didn't Deserve The Loan
Ian Locklear received a loan to go to the the University of South Florida in spite of the fact that he had never finished high school. He graduated but is now suing the government claiming that he didn’t deserve the loan (he left high school in 11th grade, which would technically disqualify him from being able to attend college).
Florida Man Tries To Steal Car That Won't Start
Aldrick Markcus Jones jumped into a car with his backpack, ready to drive to Orlando. Unfortunately for him, however, the car wouldn’t start, which gave the owner time to run out and hold him until the police arrived.
Shark Knocks Florida Man Off Paddleboard
Maximo Trinidad got knocked off his paddleboard by a fast moving spinner shark but fortunately climbed right back on his board and kept going. The story got pretty big because the whole incident was captured on Maximo’s GoPro camera.
Florida Man Vows To Eat Shark That Bit Him
Allen Engelman returned to go fishing at the beach where he had been bitten by a shark. He ended up catching a shark that he claimed was the same one to bite him, and in an act of vengeance, he said he would eat it (this is legal in Florida as long as the shark is a certain length).