25 Craziest Political Promises Ever

Although Vermin has made plenty of crazy promises in his comical political career, the promise to provide everyone with ponies and move the United States to a pony based economy really topped off the list.

During his presidential run with John Kerry, John Edwards promised that disabled people will get up out of their chairs and walk again.

Although he had a point with his statement (legislation does have a tendency of getting a bit wordy), Herman didn’t manage to convince anyone.

Dan promised the country that no other nation in the world will have better educated American citizens. Touche, Dan…touche.

This 54-year-old California Congress candidate campaigned on several issues, but smoking a marijuana cigarette on the steps of Capitol Hill became a highlight.

Hmmm…unfortunately, Ronald, it may be a little too late for that.

While this promise might not sound crazy to some, the craziest part about this promise is that Trump insists that Mexico will pay for it, if not upfront, than through some sort of reimbursement.

Have you ever tried to read a globe upside down? Well, don’t…because then things like this happen.

When Thompson ran for sheriff of Pitkin County in 1970, he promised he would tear up all the asphalt in Aspen, replace it with sod, and use the asphalt to build a parking lot just outside the city.

Kucinich repeatedly called for the impeachment and arrest of George W Bush, essentially making it his platform, going so far as to warn the Bush administration that they should know their Miranda rights.

Eh, you know, who needs a healthy or clean environment anyway?

This one is best if read in its entirety, “I am here to make an announcement that this Thursday, ticket counters and airplanes will fly out of Ronald Reagan Airport.”

While running for U.S. President, this candidate vowed to end boredom, make Vanna White the First Lady, and hold a telethon to end the national debt.

While running for mayor of San Francisco in 1980, the Dead Kennedys singer came up with a “funny” platform.

Or their stripes, or whatever it is that zebras have these days.

After reading enough of these, it may start to seem as though politicians don’t necessarily have the strongest grasp on geography.

According to Ronald, he “has orders to be awakened at any time in the case of a national emergency, even if he’s in a cabinet meeting.”

…or at least stop eating them until Nabisco moves production from Mexico to the United States.

As if his plan to cut all three of these government departments wasn’t crazy enough, he only managed to remember two of them during the debates.

Although it was never directly stated by Hoover himself, the party convention ran this slogan to advertise his platform of prosperity.

Sometimes it’s good just to get the obvious stuff out of the way so you can focus on the more important matters at hand.

Not only did Newt promise a moon colony, he promised it by the end of his second term in the year 2020.

Called the “Space-Age Candidate” in 1960, Green had lofty goals of creating a real UTOPIA by eliminating poverty with credit cards. He also promised free insurance and no taxes.

Prior to all the mudslinging of the 2012 presidential campaign, Obama vowed not to call Mitt Romney weird…which is kinda weird?

It seems a little counter-intuitive, but apparently, it struck a chord with voters. It didn’t, however, stop Roosevelt from running for a third term in 1912.