It seems a bit paradoxical, but a large part of our economy (a good thing) is built on the fact that we are quite poorly behaved towards one another as humans (a bad thing). Without getting too deep, it is probably worth pointing out that if we weren’t so nasty towards each other, there wouldn’t really be any need for an economy in the traditional sense of things or for many of the jobs out there because we would probably all just share everything. We know, that’s communism and there’s no room for that in these parts. Well, yeah, it’s true. Communism gets messy, but that’s not because communism is flawed. It’s because we are flawed. It all comes back to people and how we treat each other.
Most developed economies are built around the fact that people are selfish and not very nice to each other. They harness that very effectively and turn it into something that is beneficial to all of us. That is the magic of capitalism. It somehow manages to bring something good out of something bad. So, without being any more philosophical than we have to be, these are 25 jobs that wouldn’t exist if people were actually decent to each other.
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Locksmiths
Because we wouldn’t need locks
Child Protective Services
Because being able to have a baby doesn’t necessarily make someone able to care for it.
Soldiers
Until Independence Day….just because people are decent doesn’t mean squat about aliens.
Escalation teams
These are the guys at the call center who you get referred to when you ask for the “manager.”
Lawyers
They have colleges that teach people how to deal with human indecency.
Bodyguards
Because people wouldn’t mug you. They would ask you kindly.
Moderators
Because people are even worse when they’re anonymous.
Graffiti Removers
Depending on your perspective, either the removers or the artists are to blame, but either way, the removers would be out of a job.
Alarm salesmen
Because people would ask you before trying to come into your house.
Tax Auditors
Everyone would just donate to the IRS
Cashiers
They wouldn’t even have to watch the self checkout line.
Ushers
They are there so that we don’t kill each other over seats.
Anti-virus software companies
To be fair, many of these companies produce things that are even worse than malware.
Asset protectors
They’re the guys that stand at the exit and “check” your receipt to make sure you didn’t steal anything.
City Inspectors
Although some of the code violations are simply due to the passing of time and human error, there’s also the people who just don’t care about rules.
Animal Rescue Services
Or that advertisement that has Sarah McLachlan playing in the background…
Bouncers
Because people are even less decent when they’re drunk.
Rhino watcher
All because people try to poach them.
Police Officers
Okay, so that was kind of obvious.
Litter collectors
Except in Singapore
TSA (Transportation Security Administration)
At least they make people feel safe, right?
Parking lot security guards
This is possibly the lowest rung of the “security jobs” ladder.
Prison Guards
Because there wouldn’t be bad guys to put in prisons
Social worker
If people were decent, there would be no need.
Shopping cart collector
Because apparently throwing your shopping cart in the canal is easier than just returning it