Superpowers are by their very nature not lame. How could they be? They’re super. It’s in the name. Today though, we are going to switch things up just a little bit. Obviously this list isn’t meant to be informative. It’s not even meant to be funny. It’s more of a thought experiment. Is it possible? Could we possibly come up with superpowers that are so lame you wouldn’t even be excited about having them, but at the same time so useful that you would probably use them more than you would think? The answer is, yes. We can come up with those superpowers, and we did come up with those lame and useful superpowers.
Whether it is the ability to find exactly what you are looking for or the ability to wake up exactly when you want to, these superpowers are too lame to brag about. Your friends would definitely not be impressed, and even if you wanted to impress them, there’s not too many impressive things that you could do with your superpower anyway. So, in honor of all the normal, average, regular Joes and Janes out there, let’s take a closer look at these 25 incredibly lame but somewhat useful superpowers.
Featured Image: Gareth Simpson via Flickr
Understanding dogs when they bark
It’s probably about food.
The ability too see exactly how everything went wrong in bad situations.
Inserting the USB into the port perfectly on the first attempt
This would be perfect for low light situations.
Knowing exactly how long to reheat food in the microwave.
No more guesswork.
Stopping grass from growing
Now this would be practical.
Never losing your personal belongings
Who wouldn’t want this?
Turning everything transparent...except the thing you're looking for
Just in case you still somehow manage to lose something.
Turning invisible when nobody is watching you
At least you’d always be able to tell if you’re within somebody’s line of sight.
Being able to tell what people are listening to on their iPod
At least it would be entertaining.
Being able to even everything out
You’d basically be the OCD hero. Crooked picture? Not anymore!
Constantly emitting a strong, stable wi-fi signal
Admittedly, this will become less useful with time.
Fascinated by the idea of superpowers? Here are 25 Incredible People With Real Superpowers.
Eating anything you want and not having it affect your health
It’s time to eat cake.
Functioning normally without sleep
That’s a lot of extra time right there.
Remembering people's names the first time
The ability to increase your internet speed to the advertised amount
Because you’re basically paying them to not give you anything faster than that.
Bug repellent skin
Some people seem to already have this one….
Always knowing the perfect thing to say in any situation
For most people, this only happens when you’re taking a shower the next morning.
Being able to convince people that paper doesn't exist
Just throw rock, you’ll win every time.
Never having to the use the bathroom
Kind of like Kim Jong Un.
The ability to make toilet paper magically appear out of thin air
Unfortunately, once you acquire the previous power, this one would become obsolete.
Being able to teleport to and from work
Forget rush hour.
Being able to telepathically turn out the lights
No more getting out of bed.
Being able to fall asleep on command
If you can’t have the “no-sleep” superpower, then this could be your consolation.
Being able to turn your hearing off (and on)
Unfortunately, most of this power’s usefulness would be nullified by the previous power.
Being able to communicate in every language
Although this sounds like a legit superpower, if you ask most people, they’d probably inform you of its lameness. But man would it be useful.
If you liked this list and also like art, check out these 25 Bewildering Renditions Of Supernatural Powers.