15 Things That Everybody Should Do On The John

There are usually two things everybody needs to do in the morning; get prepared for the rest of your day, and take care of some “business” that built up overnight.

You can cut your morning prep down substantially, however, with just a little multitasking here and there. Why not use some of that time you’re sitting on the toilet to try out a new face mask or finish brushing your teeth. Just make sure to be careful where you put your hands.

A lot of times all the buzzing and notifications from carrying our connection to the outside world in our pockets can get a little overbearing, so don’t feel bad when you’ve finally got to break down and check up on what everyone else has been up to lately.

The best time for many people to do this is in the bathroom, where there’s no pesky bosses or people to tell you to get back on track.

Everybody has those embarrassing conversations that don’t go at all how they hoped and, although you can’t go back and change time, sometimes it does help to sit back in a nice, private bathroom and replay the whole talk in your head, only this time you’re prepared and in control.

As many people who’ve used it before know, Reddit is the place to find pretty much anything you need online, no matter how crazy. The one problem is that once you start looking you might never stop scrolling.

Normally you might be too busy to allow yourself this kind of distraction, but when you’re stuck in the bathroom anyway there isn’t anything keeping you from browsing to your heart’s content.

Sometimes things are hard and you feel like the world is out to get you, and it’s times like these that you need something to pick you up and make you feel a little better.

Don’t ever feel ashamed about taking some time to give yourself a quick pep talk while you’re using the lavatory. You’re awesome, and you can do anything you want!

We get it; you’re all alone, got your hands free, and you’ve got the perfect mirror for choreographing your own dance moves right in front of you. Enough Said.

One of the best things to do while sitting on the toilet, waiting for that dreaded, stomaching churning, last load to drop, is to ponder the universe.

Ponder those questions the universe as cursed on us. Ones we’ll never have answers to. Questions like, “why do people read about what other people can do in the John…”

Very important stuff.

Perhaps one of the most overlooked activities to do while sitting on the John it perfecting your selfie. You’ve got nowhere to go, a limited amount of space, and some time on your hands so why not practice your selfies?

Remember, if the photo image looks bad, no one will see it because you’re in the John!

Mobile games are made for anybody who gets bored on easily, which makes them perfect for when you’re stuck in a bathroom finishing your business.

Just make sure you don’t get too caught up in your game, or you might look up only to find you’ve been sitting for way too long and your legs are sleep!

For women, we have a great idea. That last bit of makeup you need to apply, do that while sitting on the john!

We swear you will save the time patting down your checks and adding that last shimmering gloss to your lips when you do it sitting on the John and waiting for that load to drop before the party starts! Of course, make sure to wash those hands before you get going!

When nature calls, you gotta do what you gotta do to get that load out. But, it takes time to make a good drop happen.

So, we suggest using that time to make some phone calls you’ve been holding off. It’s easy, take a load, make a phone call. Now, isn’t that productive? We think so!

This sounds a bit strange, but the best place to sit and pick at your face, is on the John. Simply hold that mirror up and work on the ungodly mess you call a face.

Tweezer out those horrid stray hairs, trim that nostril stache and dig up some whiteheads. Self-perseveration is key to good hygiene, even if you are doing it, sitting on a john!

Apps like Tinder, Bumble, and Zoosk have given people new ways mingle…alone.

So, use it when you’re sitting on the toilet. Before you know it, you’ve relieved yourself, and found a date for the evening! Talk about a win, win, bathroom situation!

Between work, social lives, and all the other distractions, the time that we spend reading a book has unfortunately slipped through the cracks…

That is… until you take that book with you to the John! Catch up on some good reading while you’re pushing out the day’s stresses (and excess foods)!

It’s unbelievable, but some people actually go to the john, relieved themselves and leave. They’re obviously boring people!