The 25 Worst Movies Ever
Posted by February 16, 2012on
This isn’t just a list of bad movies. This is a list of movies that have gone above and beyond what it would normally take to be classified as awful. These are the horror films that make you laugh and the actions flicks that make you cry. Chock full of painful camera angles, laughable scripts, and atrocious acting, most of have won numerous Razzies and left a trail of destroyed careers in their wake. Like the black sheep of the family, however, we still love them and proudly present to you the 25 worst movies ever.
Although the original could be considered a near perfect action movie, the sequel almost seemed like it was deliberately created to flop. For starters, why would you have a movie called Speed take place on a cruise ship? Six knots is not very fast. As Anthony Lane said, “Where, pray, is the speed? I can bicycle faster than this ship. I know people who can swim faster. If things carry on like this, we can look forward to Speed 3 taking place on the back of a pony.”
Not only was this movie terrible, it didn’t even have any trolls! Italian director Claudio Fragasso barely spoke any English when he wrote the script with his wife, and yet insisted that the actors deliver their lines word for word as written. To this day, however, he still defends the movie as a masterpiece and to his credit Troll 2 has developed a cult following.
Based on the novel North: The Tale of a 9-Year-Old Boy Who Becomes a Free Agent and Travels the World in Search of the Perfect Parents by Alan Zweibel, this film as been labeled as “one of the hardest movies to watch from start to finish” by critics and has been derided for its portrayal of various ethnic stereotypes. North has an 11% rating on Rotten Tomatoes.
Meant to depict the battle of Inchon during the Korean War, this film failed miserably. Between the producer turning out to be a member of the Japanese Unification Church (the controversial organization headed by Sun Myung Moon), the U.S. military pulling its backing from the film (partially due to the Unification Church connection), and almost every other conceivable problem during production, the film was doomed from the get go.
There’s really not much more to know once you’ve seen the title – giant spiders come to Earth and kill people. One interesting piece of trivia: the final spider boss was actually a volkswagen covered in fur with people holding the legs out the windows. Some have said it’s worth watching just for that.
It’s a bad movie about making a bad movie, how could have been anything other than…bad? Grossing only $52,850 it was a commercial catastrophe and will certainly be remembered as one of the worst films ever.
The story line centers around Pauly Shore and Stephen Baldwin as they stop to look for a toilet while on a road trip. Thinking they are in a shopping mall, it turns out to be a biosphere housing a team of scientists that are voluntarily locked in for a year. With a score of only 1 out of a possible 100 on Metacritic Bio-Dome is tied for being the worst rated film on the site.
Just about the only redeeming thing in the entire movie is a plane getting eaten by a shark. A big, rubbery, fake looking shark. Roger Ebert summed up the popular sentiment when he called Jaws: The Revenge “not simply a bad movie, but a stupid and incompetent one”.
Featuring Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck one would think you couldn’t go too wrong. Not so. Gigli was pretty close to being the biggest box office bomb ever, costing $54 million to produce and bringing in only $6 million.
Starring Kelly Clarkson and Justin Guarini, even the actors themselves have turned their backs on the film, which is understandable considering it was part of their contractual obligation to American Idol. You know a movie is bad though when it wins 7 Razzies and on top of that prompts the creation of a new one.
This movie was so bad that it actually got pulled from circulation. Intended to be a parody of the Cabbage Patch Kids it has been severely criticized for its tasteless humor, especially considering that its audience was supposed to be young children. One New York Times critic was even quoted as saying the film is “too repulsive for children or adults of any age” and is “enough to make you believe in strict and faraway boarding schools.”
The insanely expensive to produce western that was based on the Johnson County War in 1880 Wyoming, Heaven’s Gate singlehandedly ended the career of director Michael Cimino and brought down independent film studio United Artists. Many critics claim that not only was it terrible, it was also the most wasteful movie ever.
Parodies of parodies are never good ideas (see #11) but Soul Plane dives right in and goes for the urban spoof of the classic comedy Airplane. With a severe drought of humor, however, Empire Magazine was even quoted as saying, “Snoop Dogg’s stoner pilot comes close to funny. Well, he’s in the same postcode at least. Well, the same country. If that country is Russia.”
This famously bad film was the first to take all the Razzies at the Golden Raspberry Awards including Worst Picture and Worst Actress. To date Mommie Dearest has still received what many consider to the be the nastiest reviews of any movie ever.
Living up to its title, Disaster Movie is the latest bomb coming to us from the creators of Epic Movie, Date Movie, and Scary Movie. William Goss of Cinematical was even quoted as calling it a “disaster first, and movie…barely.”